September 27, 2004

Breaking Out

A alarming reaction to John Kerry's speech in Spring Green Wisconsin today, as herds of disgruntled dairy cows left their farms and made their way to Tomah, where the massive black & white herd began to trudge West on Rt 90. Minnesotans were said to be organizing a vigilante posse in an attempt to turn the bovines south at Rt 35 into Iowa and save their own stocks.

Fred Loertscher, a startled Spring Green dairyman watched helplessly as his prize Holsteins disappeared into a river of bawling bovines. He said that it was something about Bush's secret plan to hurt dairy cows, a pair of Flip-flops, changing horses and California cheese that panicked the cows. The dairyman appeared to be confused after attending a Kerry campaign event where students behind wire screens were served bottled water and contorted rhetoric.

Kerry: Bush Would Hurt Dairyland

SPRING GREEN, Wis. -- Democratic presidential candidate John Kerry told voters in America's Dairyland on Monday that President Bush had a secret plan that would hurt milk producers after the election.

Kerry tried to convince voters in this rural community, where he is practicing for Thursday's debate, that he would look out for dairy farms here even though he hadn't always in the past.

In the 1990s, Kerry supported the Northeast Dairy Compact, a regional pricing program that propped up prices for Northeastern dairy farmers over objections from their Midwestern counterparts.

However it appears the cows understood the Senator perfectly.

Posted by feste at September 27, 2004 07:35 PM | TrackBack
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