Back Away From The Cliff, Governor

CBS Poll: Dean Pulls Away In Demming Race.

Former Vermont Governor Howard Dean has pulled away from the field in the Demming Presidential nomination race: his support among Demming primary voters nationwide has risen in the past month, and held steady after the news of Saddam Hussein's capture. But the race remains open: more than half of Demming voters still have no opinion of Dean, most have not made up their minds for sure, and large numbers remain undecided.

In order to better understand this phenomenon, a little background:

The North American Demming’s range is, but not limited to, the politically obtuse, union halls, the Black Caucus, Northern Cailfornia, elite Northeastern salons, the media, universities and the lush green tundra of monied Hollywood – where it is found to thrive.

Demmings are notorious for the extreme fluctuations in theirs numbers. In presidential election years they seem to be everywhere, but during mid-term election years they are only conspicuous by their absence.

Demming populations typically exhibit pronounced cyclical variations over periods of 4 years, with numbers in peak years dozens of times higher than during mid-term election years. The heights of these peaks also vary, with the North American Demming tendency to run off the nearest policy cliff during a national crisis.

During these special Demming years, populations are so dense that journalists on the fells of Liberal Land can hardly move without sending the creatures scurrying off in every direction. Some Demmings also become so fearless that they will boldly stand their ground when faced with irrefutable facts.

Demming years have waxed and waned since the Great Depression. Some believe that Demmings fall from the sky like rain, while others even suggest that they are searching for their former home, Camelot. Priests even registered election victories of Demmings in church diaries, as they were also thought to be an precursor to war.

Demming populations can increase dramatically during primaries when zealous presidential nominees are at their peak; but conservative voter registration and donations will then increase, and defeat more Demmings, soon causing a downturn in their numbers. With opposition in short supply, the conservatives will subsequently themselves become complacent, until a Demming Leader, such as Howard Dean, stirs the Demming horde, and the whole cycle begins again.

Posted by feste at December 18, 2003 11:48 AM | TrackBack